i have been here all along i have just not been willing to sit and type. journals and journals have been filled and picture after picture has been taking - i just kept them next to my heart instead of sharing.
im ready to share.
i think that i have been extremely still lately. chopin usually wakes up with me in the morning and keeps me quietly content all day long. we write to chopin in class now. the other day mike walked into my class and said he felt like he was in a scene from silence of the lambs. christopher said "no way it's like we are in a coffee shop." little did he know that one day very soon i might just leave them all to start that coffee shop i dream of.
i don't know what to say besides the fact that i think that i am just growing - learning - healing - hurting and then healing agian.
i have these huge moments of joy where i think "dang life is so good and i am so undeserving" to other moments when i think that i need lots of road under my feet and i need to get as far away from life as i know it as possible.
a happy medium is what i am looking for and until then i will try to be extra still to fight the domastic life that has seemed to take over.
oh. and someone gave me a cat...and i hate cats. but i love this cat. it is shocking how much he has become a part of my existence. i am not a cat women but i will talk to mine and cuddle with him like you wouldn't believe and miss him when i have not been home for a while and wonder what he does all day long without me being there to play with him. but i am not a cat women.
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